More Progress in Week 5

Jayden's one month birthday.  It is amazing how fast time goes.  It seriously feels like we just left the hospital last week.  At his one month check-up, Jayden weighed 10 lbs 12 ounces - 3 lbs more than when he was born!  And he has grown 2 inches, to a whopping 23-1/2 inches long.  All good signs that feeding is going well and that Jayden is going to be a giant!

Good thing he's growing so well, because he's got some HUGE expectations on his shoulders...

I haven't mentioned this yet, and it's not something people like to talk about, but it's real and it affects a lot of new moms, I would guess: the "baby blues" and/or post-partum depression.  Before I left the hospital, they gave me a quiz to test where I was on the scale.  Turns out I tested higher than they like - and after speaking with the doctor (not mine, but one of the doctors from his practice), it was more that I had post-partum anxiety than post-partum depression.  She encouraged me to reach out to support groups, to other moms, etc.  So, after being home a few days and having some rough times, I found a group called SoCal New Moms Connect.  It meets weekly for eight weeks and is for new moms with babies under 6 months old.  I've been going now for 4 weeks.  Jayden is by far the youngest baby in the group, but I've learned a lot from the moms with older babies.  I've learned it's not necessarily guaranteed that I'll get to sleep through the night, maybe ever, but definitely not by four months.  It might happen, but it might not - and there's only so much (or maybe nothing) I can do to change that.  I've learned that having one child is hard, but having two is way more than twice as hard; the mom of twins in our groups is nothing short of amazing.

I can't say that this group has solved all my problems, that I haven't had crying fits at 2 am, 11 am, 4 pm, or whenever it hits me, or that I haven't doubted myself every single day at some point or another, but it has helped me realize that more than anything I need to love my baby.  If I can at least do that, then I can get through this and Jayden will likely thrive. It has also taught me that going out of the house with Jayden is a good thing.  I go out weekly to the group, and the moms have gotten together on other occasions as well.  I run errands with Jayden (in the 1-1/2 to 2 hours I have in between feedings), and if I don't make it home in time, then I feed and change Jayden wherever I am.  Basically, it has helped me gain some sort of confidence  and has given me a connection to other moms where I can ask questions and not feel like a total idiot!

For any new mom, I highly recommend surrounding yourself with a group of people, whether they're you're old friends or new friends, who you can speak to about the amazing changes you go through when a baby arrives in your life.  And if that doesn't help, talk to your doctor.  Your health has a significant impact on your child's health - so make sure you are taking care of you as much as you can.