But honestly? Sometimes it's not okay. I am so tired. The kind of tired you can feel in your bones. And Dakota is even sleeping through the night, so it's not even an up five times a night tired. (although she's not sleeping now - at 9:30 pm on Saturday night - which is just one of the reasons today is hard). I'm tired of everything being so hard. I'm tired of planning dinner, of grocery shopping, of doing laundry, of cleaning up little people's bodily functions, of not having enough time for anything, of always being on someone else's schedule, whether it's work, home or otherwise. Not \every day, but some days, it takes everything I have to motivate myself to get up and be happy and excited about the day to come.
It's not a lie when I say I love my kids. Because I do, with all my heart. But I need the next six to twelve months to go faster than you can imagine. I'm not saying it will be easier then, but the challenges will be different. And right now I need different.
I know this is a downer for a Saturday night, but I had to get it out. I don't need sympathy; this is the life we chose and we'll get through it. I think more than anything I just need people to know - to know that when I smile and say "I'm good," there's something else going on that isn't always "great" or even "good."
On to the good stuff - the cutest kids you've ever ever seen. :)
(On a related note, as we were leaving a restaurant at lunch today, I overheard a woman saying to a co-worker (about our kids), "did you see those two kids? Those are the cutest kids I've ever seen!" So it's not just me who thinks they're cute!)
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| A little Athletes First love, while also exhibiting her spitting skills. She's pretty proud of her spitting skills. |
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| How we all felt on Tuesday night. It has been an exhausting few weeks. |
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| Jayden. Not much else to say here. |
Probably one of my favorite videos of all time. I had given Dakota her bath and decided to put her in Jayden's just for a minute. She started splashing, and getting me and Jayden all wet. So we started laughing. Which made her laugh and splash even harder. This went on for quite a while, which is the only way I was able to capture this on video. Enjoy!
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| (Finally) sleeping. Napping has been the world's biggest battle recently. And about once a week, bedtime is a disaster as well. Last week it was Sunday night. This week it's tonight. She just is wide awake and refuses to go to sleep. It's brutal, especially on a night like tonight when I have 181 things to get done in preparation for the coming week. Definitely brought me to tears. |
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| Jayden found this game my mom gave to me years ago. It's way beyond his skill set, but it involves cars and trucks so we play a version of it. Basically, you pick a card that has a set up of cars and trucks. You have to slide the cars and trucks around to get one particular car out the exit. It's a logic/puzzle/spatial orientation game. Because it's a little above his level, I read him the answers. But after doing it a few times, he was able to figure out the last few moves on his own. And as we were putting it away to go upstairs, he managed to fit all the cars and trucks into the board, based on organizing them in a certain way. Carmen and I both complimented him and he exclaimed "I'm talented!" And he was right. |
Tomorrow we have soccer class and a birthday party. Then Carmen and I have work Monday, Tuesday and a little bit on Wednesday. Gigi and Mom-mom arrive Monday around lunchtime, and are here for eight days. Next weekend we have no activities (no swim or soccer), so we'll find some other activities to entertain everyone and get the kids out of the house those days!
I'm guessing I won't make it back online before Thanksgiving, so everyone have a wonderful Thanksgiving weekend with friends/family/whoever!
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