Re-Starting Over...

So, obviously I completely failed at this blogging thing. I started it on June 6th, and here it is, October 28th and I'm just now looking at it again. Oh well. So much for the pregnancy blog - we'll try the newborn blog! Because so many people don't live near us and they all want baby Jayden updates, I'm going to try to do this weekly. Once again, no promises. We're almost seven weeks in, but I'm going to go back to the beginning and try to catch up. Hopefully I make it this time.

After 6 Weeks, Jayden is still Adorable!

Last week we got "newborn" photos taken of Jayden.  I swore I didn't want the cheesy, traditional newborn pictures - one of the main reasons I hadn't done it until now.  But then I realized if I wanted to do a birth announcement, it made sense to get some professional photos taken.  We found a photographer, Ana Brandt, and went to her studio.  I was nervous - first of all about what kind of shots we would get and second about how Jayden would react to/behave during the shoot.  Turns out he was great.  He was awake in the beginning, but soon passed out and stayed asleep through all kinds of poses.  For a preview of the photos, check out Ana's blog: http://bellybabylove.com/blog/?p=926

This week was lots of preparation for Grandma Barb and Grandpa Allan and Auntie Lizzle coming to town to celebrate a birthday for Grandpa Allan (aka Poppa).  We went to the grocery store and I swear we started packing on Tuesday to leave on Friday to go about 20 minutes from our house.  Babies are amazing in the amount of things they need.  The weekend was wonderful - lots of good family time, more photos and amazing food.
    I don't know if I've had a better dinner than the one we had Saturday night; definitely not in the past six weeks!  Oh, to be able to hire a personal chef.

Some photos:
First, Jayden may be heading towards boxing, much to Mama's chagrin:


Meeting Grandpa Allan, with Auntie Lizzle and looking over Grandma Barb's shoulder:

More Progress in Week 5

Jayden's one month birthday.  It is amazing how fast time goes.  It seriously feels like we just left the hospital last week.  At his one month check-up, Jayden weighed 10 lbs 12 ounces - 3 lbs more than when he was born!  And he has grown 2 inches, to a whopping 23-1/2 inches long.  All good signs that feeding is going well and that Jayden is going to be a giant!

Good thing he's growing so well, because he's got some HUGE expectations on his shoulders...

I haven't mentioned this yet, and it's not something people like to talk about, but it's real and it affects a lot of new moms, I would guess: the "baby blues" and/or post-partum depression.  Before I left the hospital, they gave me a quiz to test where I was on the scale.  Turns out I tested higher than they like - and after speaking with the doctor (not mine, but one of the doctors from his practice), it was more that I had post-partum anxiety than post-partum depression.  She encouraged me to reach out to support groups, to other moms, etc.  So, after being home a few days and having some rough times, I found a group called SoCal New Moms Connect.  It meets weekly for eight weeks and is for new moms with babies under 6 months old.  I've been going now for 4 weeks.  Jayden is by far the youngest baby in the group, but I've learned a lot from the moms with older babies.  I've learned it's not necessarily guaranteed that I'll get to sleep through the night, maybe ever, but definitely not by four months.  It might happen, but it might not - and there's only so much (or maybe nothing) I can do to change that.  I've learned that having one child is hard, but having two is way more than twice as hard; the mom of twins in our groups is nothing short of amazing.

I can't say that this group has solved all my problems, that I haven't had crying fits at 2 am, 11 am, 4 pm, or whenever it hits me, or that I haven't doubted myself every single day at some point or another, but it has helped me realize that more than anything I need to love my baby.  If I can at least do that, then I can get through this and Jayden will likely thrive. It has also taught me that going out of the house with Jayden is a good thing.  I go out weekly to the group, and the moms have gotten together on other occasions as well.  I run errands with Jayden (in the 1-1/2 to 2 hours I have in between feedings), and if I don't make it home in time, then I feed and change Jayden wherever I am.  Basically, it has helped me gain some sort of confidence  and has given me a connection to other moms where I can ask questions and not feel like a total idiot!

For any new mom, I highly recommend surrounding yourself with a group of people, whether they're you're old friends or new friends, who you can speak to about the amazing changes you go through when a baby arrives in your life.  And if that doesn't help, talk to your doctor.  Your health has a significant impact on your child's health - so make sure you are taking care of you as much as you can.

Week Four brings some Solutions

So, on Jayden's four week "birthday," we had some good news and some bad news.  Bad news first: no significant change in the jaundice, which means a formula diet for three days to try to kick-start Jayden's system.  Good news: Jayden weighed 9 lbs 8 ozs, meaning he gained about 14 ounces in 7 days.  Amazing.  He does know how to eat.

 The positive side of the formula feeding is that it allows Carmen to feed Jayden, getting some Dad/Son quality time in, and it forces me to start pumping, which isn't a bad thing.


We gave Jayden another bath in his whale tub this week:
  Despite Jayden's expression in this picture, bath time is not usually his favorite time...

Mama and Jayden did an errand!  We made it to the grocery store, through the grocery store and back home again with very little trouble.  Thank goodness for pacifiers.  And for big back seats, where Mama can transfer Jayden from the car seat to the baby carrier and back again when it's raining outside.

On Thursday, we got great news: after having to get Jayden poked in the arm to get his blood drawn, there was significant improvement in his jaundice.  His levels dropped three points in three days, after only dropping maybe 0.5 in the previous four weeks.  This means the formula experiment was a success, Jayden's system was kick-started and we can go back to breastfeeding.  A side benefit: we have a huge supply of breastmilk that Carmen can use to feed Jayden - yay!

I continued running (I started last week), which was good for me mentally and physically - even though incredibly difficult some mornings!  Grandma Enid left us on Sunday - so it was back to just the four of us.

Third week of life, and still yellow...

At Jayden's check-up, he was still pretty jaundiced.  We had to get his heel pricked again to check his levels.  They were barely different from his levels on the day he left the hospital, which was no good.  We're giving it another week to see if there's improvement before we take more drastic measures (although we don't know what those would be at this point).
Auntie Ellen and Grandma Enid arrived this week - Ellen for the weekend and Enid for eight days.  Exciting for Jayden to meet more of his relatives! 

Although you can't tell, Jayden is in Auntie Ellen's arms here - we love seeing those yawns, especially when they lead to sleep...